New fic is posted to ishieland on an irregular basis.

Older fic is archived in this journal under this tag, or on ff.n (lol ff.n)

( 2009 fics by fandom )

What up, internets? I'm ready for retirement. You?

The Obama administration, fearing a battle with Congress that could stall plans to close Guantanamo, has drafted an executive order that would reassert presidential authority to incarcerate terrorism suspects indefinitely, according to three senior government officials with knowledge of White House deliberations.

WTAF

Someone please tell me I've missed out a word somewhere? Please?

In other news, has Perez Hilton gone away yet? Because JFC am I ready for that day.

If you're of a certain age - an age that sees very little that is hip or retro about the nightmare fashions we wore in the 80s; seriously, nightmare - odds are pretty much even that you had the same folder I did when you were growing up. And if you didn't, you wanted it like you had never wanted anything else in your life. (And if you didn't, dude, I don't even know you.)

You know the folder I'm talking about: MJ standing against a wall, looking ridiculously adorable in a horrible yellow sweater, a fake record sticking out of the top of the thing like you were carrying your spelling papers and some seriously funky kick-ass pop down to Mrs Campbell's room like a grown-up kid who got to change classes instead of sitting in the same boring room all day long.

My mom found mine just last weekend in a bunch of stuff at her house - well, she found two, actually, because my sister and I had the exact same everything - and brought it down. We laughed ourselves sick over the childhood drawings and school papers tucked inside. At one point I looked down at the folder in my lap and it was like I was six, seven, eight years old again. Michael Jackson truly was my first Fake Celebrity Boyfriend, even before I understood what that meant exactly, and the only ringtone I've ever purchased in my life was "Thriller" (still my default ring btw). He turned out to be an incredibly fucked up individual, a man to pity or revile or both, but the impact of his music and his performances was and is undeniable.

Last year for my birthday we went to Cleveland and visited the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Amid the geeking out I was doing over Bruce's guitar, Keef's stupid top hat, Run's Adidas, and Elvis' jumpsuit, there was this moment when I looked into a display case and just kind of had this moment of total shock. It was one of the gloves - that glove - and a besequined white poofy sock that looked like the ones we wore two pairs at a time, all slouched down and ridiculous-looking. It was kind of embarrassing to see, I mean, that's what we swooned over? Seriously? In a case, under a spotlight, it looks like the sad old sock once worn by a ridiculously talented but weird man that it is. But at the same time, it was so thrilling to have it right there in front of me.

It's been a long time since Michael Jackson was someone I admired, but the news yesterday still felt like a punch to the gut. I guess you never really do get over your first crush, do you?

Michael Jackson, King of Pop, Dies

I am actually, ridiculously, crying right now. Oh my First Ever Fake Celebrity Boyfriend :(

tardis_bigbang is live! :D :D :D

My story is pretty awful (this is why you outline before you start, self) but if you'd like to check it out, I'd really appreciate any feedback you have!

Especially if you catch the fuck-ups. And oh lord do you ever have a good chance of doing that!

The art for my story, though, is adorable - thank you so much, mizz_destiny!

You know what this means though: Flaily recs coming soon! God, I love challenge reveal days. Especially when I've blocked out the last two hours of the day on my calendar so I can read instead of getting angry about work projects.

So that unpopular opinions meme? I was going to do it but I am so disconnected from fandom these days (and honestly every time I try to ease back in, I see shit like the grossest and most enraging parts of the warnings wank and it drives me right back out again) that I'm not sure what the popular opinions are anymore, plus my unpopular opinions are kind of pan-fandom and boil down to:

1. Those two canonically-straight dudes are not fucking each other, as awesome as that might be. (This does not apply to any situations involving Nick Frost and Simon Pegg, hobviously.)
   
2. Girls and women are awesome irl. Girls and women on this show/in the movie/in these books are not as awesome as they could and should be. This is Not Right.
   
3. No, that's not hot at all. Kindly stop writing fic about it.

We're doing some writing workshop tomorrow at the office and apparently we have homework before the fact? Whoops.

BTW I really miss college. &Learning things and sitting in the back of the room;

Poll #1420091 HELP ME WITH MY PSEUDO-HOMEWORK PLZ
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All

What is a really awesome word that I should consider using as my 'favorite'?

HI ALSO I RANDOMLY AM IN LOVE WITH THIS ICON AGAIN.

Okay seriously, I really need to cut down on the sugar.

Aw crap. I just realized that my apocalyptothon story is due in like three weeks. Whoops! Anyone willing to beta a shortish story that will hopefully stay fun and not take awful detours into maudlin and incomprehensible territory? :D? :D? :(

But the real point of this post is to ask: I got this gorgeous hydrangea at one of the wedding-that-lasted-forever events, but our soil is like a billion percent clay so if I stick it in the ground, it will go pink. And then die because our winters are kind of brutal. Is there a special kind of soil I can use to keep it blue in a pot or am I going to have to mess with testing the pH and adding crap to it or whatever?

My thumbs aren't so much green as they are brown like dying things, in case that's not clear.

Have you ever looked at your last.fm history and found a story waiting in the order of the songs? Because I just looked at mine and there was John Lennon's Beautiful Boy, followed by the Stones doing Have You Seen Your Mother, Baby, Standing in the Shadows, followed by a live version of Sean Lennon's Dead Meat.

...so it's not exactly a happy story, but a story nevertheless. :D:


eta hours later
OMG THERE IS MY FAKE CELEBRITY GIRLFRIEND MARY MCDONNELL BEING AWESOME ON MY TV SCREEN. And she's not even being Laura Roslin! She is adorable and I love the way she drags out her 'SH's.

So my Barbara/Ian tardis_bigbang story is in and done and the whole challenge is supposed to go live on Wednesday. Yay! Mine's like 50 pages in Word (wtaf 26000 words) and, well, pretty boring. I'm not so good with the consistent pacing. Like, at all.

Oh well! At least it's done and I don't completely hate it? \o/

Although I did just realize tonight that I completely left out an important character who was supposed to make a cameo. Argh.

Earlier tonight I found the awesomest thing ever: a bootleg of a concert Bruce Springsteen & the E Street Band gave on the day I was born!

Have you ever had one of those days where you should have just stayed in bed? I'm starting to feel like that's how I should have spent this entire month.

'Don't take vacations unless you don't plan to come home' is the moral of this story. >:(

But now I go to Mom's house for ridiculous amounts of cookout food and Ninja Warrior. \o/

(In other news, I'm now listening to Kanye and wtf why is he worried about what people are bitching about in barber shops? Kanye, you are one weird dude.)

Do you work with anyone you absolutely loathe, whose very name makes your blood pressure skyrocket and from whom a simple email can send you into a seething, festering, towering rage?

I do! She's one of those people who thinks much more highly of her position than anyone else in the company does, while not actually doing most of her job because she farms it out to other people (mostly because she doesn't know how to do it), and routinely oversteps because of it. And I recognize that most of the problem is mine, because even when she sends relatively harmless messages (or decrees, as my department has taken to calling them), I'm immediately on edge and have to have someone proof my replies before I send them.

The fact that I was just told by someone sitting nearby that there's an I Hate [This Person] Club makes me feel better. :)

And now I'm on vacation!

Addendum to previous post:

Apparently we are hanging out a lot this weekend at something called Vulcan Park? AW YEAH.

(Ino it's not that Vulcan but LOLZ)

I don't know why this is hitting me on such a delay since I've been a massive fan for, oh, almost my entire life and saw the reboot like a month ago but my brain basically just this week started going STAAAAAAAAAAAR TREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK x 24/7.

Load up on TOS audiobooks for the drive to Alabama y/mfy/who needs music when you've got Doctor Who audios too?

BTW I AM GOING TO THE ROCKET MUSEUM IN HUNTSVILLE (YAY NASA) AND THEN SEEING THE REBOOT ON THE IMAX SCREEEEEEEEN \o/ \o/ \o/

Dear Eljay, my vacations rock.

ALSO BTW I have decided that my new head canon is that JDM is actually reboot!George Kirk and/or Christopher Pike. IDENTICAL TWINS SEPARATED AT BIRTH WHAT. Don't try to talk to me about the guys who actually played those roles because I will have none of your nonsense.

Totally unrelated but I'm just now watching Monday's Colbert Report and omg you guys I am totally tearing up for no reason. Plus that camo suit is totally bitchin'.

Me: Hey, this looks like a fic I'd like to read instead of working this last half hour of the day! I really like the premise, and yay these characters! *clicks*

Fic:

Hazel blue eyes scanned the vast sea of Humans and humanoids sitting in the bleachers overlooking the parade grounds.

Me: ... >:(

Oh lol

So I keep thinking about that feline-Vulcan thing, so I go to Google and type in "vulcan feline" because a) yay fanspec, and b) NEED MOAR FIC.

Result #2? My post. /o\

IRL news, the guy here in the office who has decided that I should get married by December just came over to ask if I'd be interested in one of his friends. His opening line: How do you feel about back hair?

Um.

So yesterday I was reading a TOS fic in which the old, old, old fannish speculation that Vulcans are descended from some primal feline ancestor was used and I had such a "holy shit" moment that it kind of scared me.

I mean, really? I've only come across that one about a million times and it only just now registered? Okay then!

(It was in one of the Simple Gifts stories by Claire Gabriel and the passage was

"The infrequent torrential rains on his home planet did not make him feel at home. They made him feel sticky, as though he wanted to shake the unfamiliar humidity off his hands and feet and lick himself to wash off the wet, which was not logical either. But his mother, whose distant ancestors were not feline, insisted that rain made her feel happy."

This passage also makes me feel uncomfortable and giddy in inexplicable ways, fyi, much like the entire rest of the series. It's kind of awful Spock/OFC stuff but omfg HERE BE MONSTERSPLAK TOW, OKAY.)

HAAAAAAY GUESS WHO FORGOT UNTIL JUST NOW THAT SHE'S OUT OF TOWN STARTING THURSDAY AND THEREFORE NOT ON A COMPUTER WHERE SHE CAN FINISH HER TARDIS_BIGBANG FIC?

*weeps*

ETA BECAUSE WRITING LASTED ALL OF TWENTY MINUTES
There is not enough Saavik fic in the world. Seriously.

It is a lovely, lazy day and I need some fic to read because I'm stuck on this stupid bigbang fic. Any recs? Any fandom, any pairing, but if you have Not-Reboot!TOS fic I will love you forever.

(Did I mention that during one of my drunken weekends we watched part of a TOS episode and I basically spent five minutes cataloging every cast member who was "hot as shit" for the benefit of everyone else in the room? Because yeah. That happened. (FYI: They're all hot as shit.))


eta
I was on the verge of getting excited about the new Porn Battle but wtf it's on Dreamwidth? I can barely handle checking my flist here, there's no way I'm traipsing over there just to read or write some smut.

WHAT.

Why on earth did I never know that a) Three O'Clock High existed and b) it has hot!young!Mitch Pileggi? Years of my life, wasted!